My pain is mine, and mine alone

We made that first trip together after a long streak of grinding it out in life. We drove in a small dinky car towards the South, across several no longer existing European borders. It took us a lot more time to get to our place of destination because we continuously got lost. But that was okay since we were not in any hurry. We laughed a lot and were excited to feel like we were finally enjoying life. A few weeks later we were back home. And a few more weeks after that the toil of everyday life pushed the memory of that lovely trip back into the backrooms of our consciousness. Looking back at it, I think that was the moment she realized that -that- was the best we will ever be able to do. And she…she wanted more out of life. A few months after we broke up, she called me and enthusiastically recalled how she and her new boyfriend followed the same route down to the southern parts of Europe. She recalled how, this time, it took them only hours to reach that same destination (in his not-so-dinky car). I felt a sting in my heart, but I said nothing. She proceeded to talk about her new boyfriend’s exciting business ventures. I kept getting smaller and smaller, but still, I said nothing. To be fair to her, I think she was nervous. Her heart probably made her reach out to me. To make sure that I was doing okay. But what is there to discuss with your ex-boyfriend when all was said and done? That was the first time I realized that my pain was mine, and mine alone.

My pain is mine, and mine alone We made that first trip together after a long streak of grinding it out in life. We drove in a small dinky car towards the South, across several no longer existing European borders. It took us a lot more time to get to our place of destination because we continuously got lost. But that was okay since we were not in any hurry. We laughed a lot and were excited to feel like we were finally enjoying life. A few weeks later we were back home. And a few more weeks after that the toil of everyday life pushed the memory of that lovely trip back into the backrooms of our consciousness. Looking back at it, I think that was the moment she realized that -that- was the best we will ever be able to do. And she...she wanted more out of life. A few months after we broke up, she called me and enthusiastically recalled how she and her new boyfriend followed the same route down to the southern parts of Europe. She recalled how, this time, it took them only hours to reach that same destination (in his not-so-dinky car). I felt a sting in my heart, but I said nothing. She proceeded to talk about her new boyfriend's exciting business ventures. I kept getting smaller and smaller, but still, I said nothing. To be fair to her, I think she was nervous. Her heart probably made her reach out to me. To make sure that I was doing okay. But what is there to discuss with your ex-boyfriend when all was said and done? That was the first time I realized that my pain was mine, and mine alone.