I woke, before I opened my eyes, to a world that should still have had you in it—but didn’t. I want to say this world was beautiful with you in it, even if there’s nothing I can do—no chain of seemingly unrelated events I could cajole into existence just so our paths might cross again. I go to bed never wanting to dream of you. And still I wake, unpleasantly surprised that I did anyway. I do not long for you. But my subconscious keeps reverse-exorcising you into my body. I want peace. A life without your spirit haunting me. Without your breath strangling me in the early morning hours, when my will is weak and fate pretends there is still love for you in this body. But there isn’t. I swear to God, I have let you go. So why won’t you do the same?
Khadim Zaman's Blog 