Her sins

her punishment was
that she could never heal
from the pain she inflicted on him

her guilt would wrap itself
like a boa constrictor
around her neck,
yet she had to smile
for doing anything else
would reveal the extent of her sins

she could never be sad
for him—
not in public,
nor in private

a thousand times,
she imagined him forgiving her,
but she knew
she would never permit herself
to believe that lie